Sunday, May 04, 2008


Perhaps I haven't been as clear as I should have. I love my brother, and I know that I have a much closer relationship with him than some girls do with thier brothers. I do tend to whinge and complain about his OCD and how it makes life difficult for me, but life is a whole bunch of tests and this is one that I have to go through. However, because I never complain about it out loud, except to my therapist, I need a place to let it out. As to him finding this all honesty, I really REALLY doubt it. He goes on fishing forums and gun forums. He does not look at other blogs, unless I showed it to him...which I would most likely never do. When I started this blog, my idea was to be able to use it as a journal for my feelings. I don't usually showcase my feelings here, but last night...actually that was as a remnder to me to talk to my therapist about it. She'll say what's been going on with your mother and stepfather. I'll go: I don't remember. I'm afraid I'm shutting it out on purpose, because it's unpleasant. My mother knows I have this blog, and she encourages me to write on it, so does my therapist. One of the reasons I want to go into therapy is help people like my brother. My brother is a good person, even if he goes through some rough times. But the only thing is, what you see on my blog is the rough stuff. He learns with a kid younger than him, he's taken several kids under his wing. I know of at least one boy who would very likely go off the derech if not for my brother. My brother has his own terrific mentors, who I admire and respect for helping him, even when he's going through his hardest time. So perhaps I shouldn't have posted what I did yesterday. I've taken it down, and thank you anonymous, I think I needed to post this.


Anonymous said...

Just because he can't find it doesn't mean his friends or people he knows can't. He might not want everyone in the world to know!