Thursday, May 21, 2009


A Jewish father, Moisha, was paid a visit by his eldestson Yitzak...
"Father, I am going to marry!"
His father begins to dance with joy and sing Hava Nagila...
"Tell me, is she a good Jewish girl?" says the father. "What is her name?"
"O'Brien," replies the son... "She's Catholic..."
"Oy!" says the father.... "But are you happy?"
"I'm very, very happy," says the son.
" long as you're happy ... my blessings to you both,"replies Moisha.
But the father is still counting on his remaining sons, Schlemiel and Chutzpah.
Schlemiel calls on his father the next evening."Father... I too will be married soon!"
Again, Moisha breaks out in a dance and sings God's praises...
"What is her name?," implores the father.
"Kazalopodopolous," says the son. "She's Greek Orthodox."
"Oy," says Moisha. "But are you happy?"
"I'm happy, Father."
"OK ... then you, too, have my blessing," intones Moisha.
Dejected, Moisha goes to the Temple to pray."Please God... let my remaining son, Chutzpah, marry a nice Jewish girl to raise nice Jewish childrenin your eyes ... PLEASE," he cries out.
The very next week, Chutzpah comes to his father excitedly andexclaims, "Father, I am to wed in the spring!"
"HER NAME? WHAT IS HER NAME?", his father immediately demands."Goldberg!" says Chutzpah! Moisha is beside himself with joy!
"Praise God! Praise theProphets!" Turning to Chutzpah, he asks, "Is she DoctorGoldberg's daughter Shelley, from Los Angeles?"
"No," says Chutzpah.
"Hmmm," says ! Moisha... "Must be Attorney Goldberg's daughterRachel from Beverly Hills?"
"Ah... no, Father," says Chutzpah..."What is her first name, my youngest, truest, most handsome son?"


Moshe said...

Son calls his mother and tells her, "Mom, I've met the most wonderful person, we're in love and gonna get married."
"What's her name? Is she Jewish?"
"Mom, the thing is, his name's Tony and he's Italian. But we love each other very much."
"What?! Is this how we raised you?! How can you do that to me and your father?! You'll drive us into the grave! How can you marry someone like that?! He's not Jewish!"